When we work at a fast pace and run hard all day, it can be difficult to be really present. It can be even harder to find and extend out those moments of joy or celebration – to really pause and hold ourselves there. We get lost in our fields of busy. Work. Kids. Fur babies. Doctor appointments. School activities. Board meetings. The list continues. As an entrepreneur juggling business, clients, a family, and some semblance of my own needs, I have learned that to be truly effective, we need space. Space to move from one action item to the next. Space to fully engage with our experience. Space to enjoy.
Gratitude is one tool that grants me access to this space. When my world is feeling frazzled, I focus on connecting to something I appreciate. Some way to connect to joy in my moment of challenge. It strengthens me. It nourishes and energizes me – to begin anew.
Some days though, gratitude doesn’t seem like it’s enough. Or perhaps, I just haven’t found an ability to connect to it during the messy moments of my days. That’s ok too. In times like these, something different is needed: Grit. Resilience. Endurance.
I like the word Grit. It feels a bit more raw and edgy than other similar words. It’s a reminder that resilience is not some glossed-over term, but rather a reminder that it requires real effort. Grit is that smeared clay and leftover grime on our face. The gravel dirt mark, complete with bits of broken skin, indicating a recent fall. Grit is this stuff – and it’s what helps us get back up after we’ve tumbled. That’s Grit.
For me, true resilience has always been an embodiment of these two things: Grit and Gratitude.
- Grit: sheer will power. The “Unbrokenness” inside the broken parts. Grit is the part of us that never gives up.
- Gratitude: The willingness to see and appreciate joy. The ability to focus on the good. The ability to connect to the sun, even in the midst of a torrential rainstorm.
- Resilience: the combination of these two things: Grit & Gratitude. The power to cultivate strength and engage life deeply, despite the challenges. Resilience is borne from our ability to connect to and appreciate the good in life, despite the difficulty. In fact, resilience is borne in these turbulent waters.
Over the years, I’ve found three tools that help to embrace gratitude and foster grit. They are as follows:
- Honor Yourself & Practice Self-Care. Gratitude towards life arises easily when we are in touch with our deepest selves – this is the rich and fertile ground of personal leadership. When we practice self-care, we begin to learn how to be gentle with ourselves and others. It opens the door for self-compassion, empathy, and a nurturing approach to life and leadership. Gratitude flows more freely in this environment.
- The continuous, deep honoring of self is powerful. It generates an energy and the gentleness of compassion that sparks change. Self-care reflects self-worth and self- respect. It’s the foundation for all change. Self-care is the spark for identifying and gentling our inner voices towards ourselves, and this gentleness is transferred to our interactions with others. Self-Care is the space where gratitude is borne.
- Set Healthy Boundaries: Boundaries reflect our values. They represent our efforts to prioritize and protect what is important to us. They arise naturally when Self-Care and Awareness is present. However, it’s quite common for boundaries to arise after we hit a limit, and that’s ok too. Limits inform our Boundaries.
- Connect with Joy: Find people that lift you and spark your happiness. Learn from generous people and connect with them often. Listen to uplifting and inspirational leaders. When we surround ourselves with people and ideas that bring us joy, this fills us and nourishes our core. The connection replenishes our reserves.
For additional tips, tools and research associated with Grit & Gratitude, check out two of our favorite Ted Talks on these subjects:
